Noir Boudoir

Vivian Marlowe.
Enter the Noir Boudoir.
Photo By James Wilson.

Life lessons

Some things are worth fighting for.
Times have always been tough. Why does this generation believe that everything should be served to them on a silver platter?
I am willing to work for this. I know i haven't felt like this before, and i know it is worth keeping it alive.

Wagon Wheel

Headed down south to the land of the pines
And I'm thumbin' my way into North Caroline
Starin' up the road
And pray to God I see headlights

I made it down the coast in seventeen hours
Pickin' me a bouquet of dogwood flowers
And I'm a hopin' for Raleigh
I can see my baby tonight

So rock me mama like a wagon wheel
Rock me mama anyway you feel
Hey mama rock me
Rock me mama like the wind and the rain
Rock me mama like a south-bound train
Hey mama rock me

Oh, the North country winters keep a gettin' me now
Lost my money playin' poker so I had to up and leave
But I ain't a turnin' back
To livin' that old life no more

So rock me mama like a wagon wheel
Rock me mama anyway you feel
Hey mama rock me
Rock me mama like the wind and the rain
Rock me mama like a south-bound train
Hey mama rock me

Walkin' to the south out of Roanoke
I caught a trucker out of Philly
Had a nice long toke
But he's a headed west from the Cumberland Gap
To Johnson City, Tennessee

And I gotta get a move on fit for the sun
I hear my baby callin' my name
And I know that she's the only one
And if I die in Raleigh
At least I will die free

So rock me mama like a wagon wheel
Rock me mama anyway you feel
Hey mama rock me
Rock me mama like the wind and the rain
Rock me mama like a south-bound train
Hey mama rock me.

It's been too long. So much is happening in my world and i have such little time to write about it these days. It is funny though, i seem to find myself on this old thing when i have a feeling of lack luster and nostalgia of not so distant times (which are growing farther away each day)

I woke up yesterday morning. I got up and put on a song that played as my alarm once, and curled back into bed. The gushing feeling of everything that has happened to me, is happening to me and will happen to me, hit me like a tonne of bricks. The worrying thing is though, i was not happy. Or perhaps it was too overwhelming.

Ah Overwhelming. That adjective seems to attach itself to my daily routine like feathers to honey. My body is a petty coward right now. I crumble under the pressure of physical exertion and emotional stress. The doctors tell me "Hypersensitivity" is all apart of my condition. I sure am tired of it. I want to be able to feel sheer emotion again and run as fast and as far as i like, without having to worry that i'll need to go to bed afterward because "i have done my time for the week" I don't want to feel tired anymore. And i most certainly do not want to worry anymore.

I will get better. I can't let this get the better of me. it's damn hard sometimes.